Thin on Top

by John Passmore

The one advantage of thinning hair (we don't use the 'b' word) is that haircuts don't take long.

This was important because I spent a good part of yesterday trying to persuade one of my colleagues that he could find time in his busy day to give out 50 business cards.

"Impossible," he was saying. "I start work at 8.00 a.m."

"Well how about lunchtime."

"I don't stop for lunch."

"After work then?"

"I'm shattered."

We went on like this for some time...

So how long does it really take to give out 50 business cards and talk to six people? I had one hour to get into town, get my hair cut, do my daily activity and get off to my 11.30 appointment.

It was raining - so that was a good excuse to take the Mini. In the car park the next door car contained a businessman with all his papers spread out on the passenger seat while he peered at his mobile gadget. I tapped on the window.

"It looks to me as if you're in business," I said. "May I ask what you do?"

He sold watch batteries.

"That's great. I'm always looking for salespeople. Would you be interested in bolting on an extra income to what to do already?"

I had given him a DVD and swapped details before I realised I hadn't given him a card. I still had 50 to go!

Never mind, I must have shifted a dozen on the way to the hairdressers: "Have you had one of these? It's all about money... absolutely brilliant... Have you had one of these? It's all about money..."

The hairdresser hadn't watched the DVD I gave her last time. In an attempt to change the subject, she started telling me about how she and her boyfriend wanted to get their own place - which somehow led us right back to the subject of DVDs...

It was raining hard on the way back to the car so I found it necessary to pop into every shop and say: "I only came into get out of the rain. But tell you what - now I'm here, have one of these..."

All the customers got one too.

The Fed Ex man doing his delivery also got one - then we discovered I'd given him a leaflet months ago so I told him all about the business all over again and he gave me his new email address.

All the staff in the Jobcentre got cards - and they all said "thank you very much". In the TV shop I gave a mini-presentation to the three guys behind the counter and the last few cards disappeared to a gaggle of mums with pushchairs sheltering outside Boots.

I looked at my watch: 55 minutes including the haircut. I still had five minutes to get home.

In fact it all went so well that in the evening I popped out for another half an hour and did another 50 - the bowling alley, Tescos and two very empty pubs.

The silly thing is that the more you do it, the easier it gets.

I think there's an Emerson quotation about that: "Do the thing and you shall have the power..."

I know exactly what he meant.